Holidays Diary Chapter 1: The Beginning and the End in Genting

It had been long......
Since i last blogged.....
http://jpysh2004.blog.friendster.com/

The first post in blogger, maybe it should be more traditional:
"Hi! Welcome to my new blog!!! This is my first blog, hope you can enjoy it!!!"

But....What for?

Haha...Straight to the point....


A 2-month-long holidays just started....ending the first semester of my AUP in INTI. Just as the semester ended in disaster, the first trip of the holidays was the trip to Genting, the place of memories. Genting was the first ever trip which myself had organized for the school. The feelings of accomplishment overwhelmed when i first stepped into Genting on my own foot, not following others, but others following me. But now, as I again stepped into Genting, the feelings was totally different. Every part of Genting could bring back much memories to me, not only the moments I had in Genting, but also the moments I had in Tampin, TBS and also INTI. This trip to Genting was not about the trip of excitement, but the trip back to the past, the trip back to the younger me.

I had been living a easy-going, yet confusing life. I can hardly understand myself. I had been losing the incentive to work hard since i go the scholarship. In my subconcious mind, the route to success is already built nicely for me since I got this scholarship. I took it for granted. I spent time on those unneccesary things, too much time. I could have spent my time to pay attention in classes, spent my time doing revisions and spent my time preparing for examinations. Yet, i didn't. All I did was to enjoy myself, enjoying the life of a college student. I paid too much attention on things that i shouldn't have, FEELINGS. I used to feel happy about it. However, perfect moments never stay long. The ending of these is sad: poor results, screwed up life. And now, as semester ends, all these should end as well.

It was not the first time I kept everything for myself. I can barely remember when was the first time. I realised, I had got a lot of friends, but none that I dare to bet my whole life to. I never dare to pull the trigger that either lead to heaven or hell. I never dare...

Too much conflicts happened within myself. This break should made enough time for me to get things clear enough for me.